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Real Men Love . . . Abstinence

Started by ybpguide · 9 months ago

A funny thing happened on the way to sexual freedom; we began to divorce sex from our spirituality. And, when we did it became a commodity, commerce, a bargaining tool, a hobby- like reading a book, or tennis lessons.
Sex is natural and healthy. Iyanla Vanzant writes that a sexual enco ... Continue reading »

9 comments

  • Anonymous

    2 years ago

    Why is it that most people fail to realize the spiritual elementy of sex? You are connecting with someone on more than just a physical level. Anyone who has been "sprung" knows that this is true.
    reply
  • OHSucker

    2 years ago

    A great book that I encourage everyone to read is Sensual Celibacy. I think we've looked at the term celibate as something negative for far too long. I'm happy to say I'm celibate but I realize that when others hear or say the term they think of it negatively and think something's "wrong with me". LOL We really need to use the time that we have in the beginning of relationships to really get to know the person without the hinderence of sex clouded goggles.
    reply
  • NeoSemantics.com

    2 years ago

    Thanks for this one.....more!
    reply
  • Angela

    2 years ago

    Wow...just wow. I love this! I am posting this on my personal blog. More commentary later once I have had the chance to sufficiently digest this information...
    reply
  • GB

    2 years ago

    "flesh-colored lens" links to an article titled "the Young and the Sexless" from Rollingstone.com 2005. It's a great article. It has a lot deeper religious tone but it has been inspiring me for the past two years. It is a fair reporting that considers the extremes and the search a lot of us are on.
    reply
  • Nicole

    2 years ago

    Ok I get...eventhough I, like a lot of people don't want to get it. I think that is really the problem, we just don't want to understand something that is against everything that we see, hear and experience every day. Great article.
    reply
  • TonyatheNeoSoulJunkie

    11 months ago

    I am a bit late but this is a wonderful wonderful wonderful article. My mouth is still agape. So much is brought into prospective on this. I am not celibate but I have been without sex for 3 weeks now by choice. At 25 yrs old, I definitely feel like I have to start taking this (life, and relationships) more seriously. The one part about the average man, was "it." It is so many lines in this article that I can babble on about but that would take all week. Anyway, very very very good. Love the food my mind was just fed... and thank you for it.
    reply
  • Lisa

    6 months ago

    Nowadays, women are very clear about what they are having sex for. As a ybp, I am very busy and choosy about finding the one, and Dayton OH is not the place for a husband. HOWEVER, in the meanwhile, I do partake of a casual sexual relationship, where a conversation of HIV testing, STDs, and expectations are discussed. Just because you do that, you need to understand that not all women become emotionally involved, or are looking for love. Its funny, because the men I have had a relationship with, and still do, really don't believe its possible for me not to start having feelings, when the exact opposite starts to happen. They end up having feelings for you! (probably because of the completely stress free relationship they have...)

    Just wanted to put it out there that some women are very much able to compartamentalize their sexuality, and not suffer from bouts of depression or low self-esteem in a fruitless quest for a love connection.

    Lisa
    reply
  • gib

    6 months ago

    that's a critical, Lisa. Just knowing what we want and being open and honest about that. I wonder if many of us do that. Prepare and plan and have an intention behind sharing ourselves and our bodies that way. I think otherwise we can find ourselves experiencing hurt, disgust, regret, confusion, addiction, etc.

    my opinion has changed somewhat since writing this. i don't believe that anything we do with our physical body can separate us from our True Selves, and Divinity. But, I do think that some of our choices are evidence of lack of alignment with our True Selves and the Divinity of others.

    also, it's important for women and men. I find that both gay and straight-identifying males and females experiencing discomfort after sharing themselves this way without purpose, clarity and sense of their worth. Straight-identifying women just get the wrap. And, probably just because you all are willing to talk about it more. so thanks :)
    reply

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